Cori felt inspired to take more pictures of Orry, partly because his skin is now lovely and also partly in guilty response to the relative absence of pictures of Orry in contrast to Finn (the First Child) at this stage. Since she was doing it at home, without me there, Finn was mooching about and so he decided to join in. This turned into a lovely brother fun session, as it were clearly the perfect alignment of their moods and they got on splendidly and lovingly for a (relatively) long space of time - time enough for some lovely pictures:
Looking back through them, there are some lovely little sequences, like the one above. Also this nice bit of brotherly playfulness:
There is also this apparent tale of Orry punching Finn, which wasn't really so (you'd know it if it was - tears, protestations, outrage etc.):
Then Finn started fooling with the sheet:
Orry got into the swing of things too:
Then they hit the sweet spot of cuteness...
... and then everything descended into silliness.
All very lovely.
The things that my note reminded me of were as follows:
Teacher and child:
Finn likes role-play games these days; role-play games in which he involves the whole family. The game normally consists of a very drawn-out allocation of roles, following by a confused and mostly contentless interaction where we all refer to each other by our allocated roles, but actually do very little. One of his favourite is for one of us to be the teacher, and everyone else to be the "childs." Such a game might go as follows:
Finn: You be the child and I'll be the teacher.
Cori: Ok.
Finn: No, no. You be the teacher, and I'll be the child.
Cori: Ok.
Finn: No, 'teacher'.
Cori: Yes: Ok, teacher.
Finn: Deedah?
James: Yes?
Finn: You be a child.
James: I thought Mama was the child.
Finn: No, you be the child, and you be the other child.
James: Right.
Cori: Who is Orry?
Finn: He's not a child, he's just a baby.
Cori: Can he be the baby-child.
Finn: Ok, child.
This can go on for quite a while, before it is followed by a riveting exchange such as the following:
Finn: Child, child.
Cori: Yes?
Finn: No, no. I'm the teacher.
Cori: Right. Yes, teacher.
Finn: ... Child, child.
Cori: Yes, teacher.
Finn: Err... ask me a question.
James: I thought you were the teacher?
Finn: Yes, child?
James: I thought you were the teacher; you should be asking us the questions.
Finn: Child, child.
James: Yes, teacher?
Finn: Err... what's your name, child.
James: James.
etc.
A very irritating game. I try and get away from them as soon as they start emerging, but Cori has grown a thick skin to them - at least she gets a chance to just sit down through them.
Football teamers:
Independently of Finn's getting the Spurs shirt, we got out the football for a game of football, which he was really excited about (it's not something we ever do, really). He doesn't understand the idea of competing in football (or perhaps in anything) - it is just a matter of taking turns to catch it, or kick it, or score goals - all of which are met focusedts-in-the-air cheers, which is rather lovely. But what we found particularly lovely was that Finn's improvised name for the activity of playing football was being "football teamers." We didn't correct him - we rather liked it!
Driver and Lady:
Finn's role-play also extends to when we're on the bus, when one of us is a driver, and the other is "the lady." Normally he's the driver, but not always - sometimes he will assign himself that role, but it doesn't last long, as The Lady doesn't really have anything to do.
I had thought that it was just a quietly unpleasant appearance of gender roles in his play, but then I realised that I was repeating the pronunciation of the bus-stops after the automated announcements on the bus one day sat with Finn mid-game. I realised that the voice was a lady, and that I had been allocated that role alongside Finn's driver. I suddenly felt much happier about it, knowing that it was a the two roles of all busses being acted out: the driver (who is generally male) and the announcer (who is always female)!
Whatever and Wife:
This is unlike the other regular role-play characterisation that Finn has us play. This comes when he wants to be something without obvious partnering. So, not a doctor (with a nurse) or a teacher (with a child) or, apparently, a driver (with a Lady). Rather, something like a farmer, a mechanic or a football-teamer. For things like this, the other person has to be the Wife.
Things get a little confused when he tries to get me and Cori involved, but he'll normally then just change the role-play.
I blame The Farmer. If it wasn't for him, the trope of "... and wife" wouldn't be ready-to-hand for Finn. What a rubbish nonentity of a role to play - Wifes don't even do anything. The most we can hope for is to watch the Farmer Farming (which looks a bit like poking something with an imaginary stick, by the way - presumably crops or cattle), or perhaps be asking circular questions that all being with "Wife, wife..."
New job meeting:
Cori's got a new job, moving from the Docklands Museum focussed on the Thames and its means of telling the story of London, to the archaeology department of the whole Museum of London. She is to start it at the end of her Maternity Leave, in October.
As a part of this, she had to go in for a meeting to chat about stuff one morning. It was scheduled to be an hour or so, so I took the morning off, dropped Finn off at nursery, and then strolled along the canal towards Victoria Park with Orry in the carrier. My thought was that it would take him 30 minutes or so to fall asleep, and then stroll back leisurely to be close by for when Cori called upon her emergence.
Orry was on cue, Cori's meeting wasn't.
Orry fell asleep within 30 minutes, and I walked to Victoria Park, and back (an hour) and I was just setting off the other way along the canal when he stirred, so I went back an walked about the small park and the one road outside Cori's (new) work for another hour as I grew tired and Orry came closer and closer to fully waking. I didn't have any milk or anything to give him, so we couldn't go in anywhere, and it was too cold to put him down anywhere - so I was rather worried about what was to happen. But, just after the two-hours mark, Cori emerged and took him straight off me, before darting off to her second appointment and I had a (rather weary) walk into work.
... It's not a very remarkable story, but it was a remarkable event, for me at least. It was the sort of aimless walking that I would do a lot of with Finn, and around the same streets as then (when we lived in a different place). It felt good (at first) to be care-free and strolling with the sleeping one as I took a look at the world. It was nice. And then it was really worrying to not know what to be doing with the baby and to be really wishing for a situation not to come about as I didn't know how I was going to cope with it. That too, in a slightly less pleasant sort of way, has been something that I've not really experienced since Finn. It was strange to go back to that situation and that fearfulness. A strange form of being at home in a feeling quite so terrifying!
Upon thankfully handing him over to Cori at last she pointed out that that was what she had to cope with all the time, every day, every week... I took her point...
Smiling and getting:
Now that Orry is smiling, at everyone, we're really noticing the difference. We find ourselves now generally pretending that we do not see the old man or the young woman or the young boy who are on the bus seat behind us, or walking behind us on the street, or waiting at the lights beside us etc., because Orry will have seen them and beamed them a great big smile over our shoulder, to which they will respond with some form a silent coo-chee-cooing or other. Sometimes we engage with it, but we tend to try not to - we tend to find that people get a bit embarrassed about it if we turn around and acknowledge it. It's nicer, for them and Orry, if we play ignorant and let them silently play over our shoulder. (A bit odd, but a lot easier, and rather lovely!)
The times when we do end up to chatting to people are generally very nice. You end up getting into pseudo-conversation with the sorts of people you wouldn't at all normally. For instance, the Africa ladies outside their church, or the Chinese woman on the bus without any apparent English, or the Polish lady on the tube who happily plays with him from across the tube carriage. Admittedly, often it's strained, and we try to avoid it generally, but it is all rather lovely. How many other people experience the streets or public transfer of London as a place where people will go out of their way to smile, speak to and compliment you?
The power of the cute baby - it is a great great force.
It also gets you things. Orry is now beginning to be given things by people, as Finn did, and still does. It seems that with his smileyness (and non-crusty skin!), he is entering the sweet spot for eliciting spontaneous acts of kindness and happiness.
It is strange, having gone through it with Finn, to see it coming on again with Orry. It is a very nice feeling; very gratifying and also very rewarding, if that isn't a silly thing to say.
Thus endeth the things that came from the notes I'd jotted down and only discovered as I opened this post up to write. However, as a reward to reading so much, there are some more pictures...
Cori's friend (from her Pregnancy Yoga, which she did with Finn) had a baby in June and Cori was delighted (and not a little flattered) to be asked to come and take some New-Born pictures of the week-old Conrad (not at all related to Finn's old friend, Conrad, who we now see only very occasionally). Conrad's mum apologised that there'd be no one else there, so Cori would have to help with the baby a bit and hold him every now and again. Cori did not mind!
Orry was with her too, and so he was perfect for testing the New Born Baby Picture space, which he did brilliant, albeit rather rather massively!
And, if it's not fully obvious to you how much of a (very cute) beached whale Orry is there... wait for it... wait for it... (cue Orry's nervous look over his shoulder at the new kid on the block):
... Behold the tiny cute baby Conrad!
It should also, probably, be noted from this that (a) what a good job Orry did at warming up the New Baby Picture location - well done Orry! - and (b) how proud Cori is feeling with the Conrad pictures! ... Which is why I put it in here - just to allow Cori the chance to bask in photographic glory!
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